Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
LETTER TO PRIME MINISTER BY PRAKASH BAJAJ (EDITOR TOI). a must read.
LETTER TO PRIME MINISTER BY PRAKASH BAJAJ (EDITOR TOI)
This is "food for thought" for every Indian...
Must Read ! Very Powerfully Worded. Bravo - Prakash Bajaj, Editor of Times of India .
LETTER OF THE EDITOR OF "THE TIMES OF INDIA " TO THE PRIME MINISTER OF INDIA
Dear Mr. Prime minister,
I am a typical mouse from Mumbai. In the local train compartment which has capacity of 100 persons, I travel with 500 more mice. Mouse at least squeaks, but we don't even do that.
Today I heard your speech, in which you said, 'NO BODY WOULD BE SPARED'. I would like to remind you that fourteen years have passed since serial bomb blasts in Mumbai took place. Dawood was the main conspirator. Till today he is not caught. All our Bollywood actors, our builders, our Gutka king keep meeting him, but your Government can not catch him. Reason is simple; all your ministers are hand in glove with him. If any attempt is made to catch him, everybody will be exposed. Your statement 'NOBODY WOULD BE SPARED' is nothing but a cruel joke on these unfortunate people of India .
Enough is enough. As such, after seeing terrorist attack carried out by about a dozen young boys, I realize that if same thing continues, days are not far away when terrorists will attack by air, destroy our nuclear reactors and there will be one more Hiroshima .
We the people are left with only one mantra. Womb to Bomb to Tomb. You promised Mumbaikar Shanghai; what you have given us is Jalianwala Baug.
Today only your home minister resigned. What took you so long to kick out this joker? Only reason was that he was loyal to Gandhi family. Loyalty to Gandhi family is more important than blood of innocent people, isn't it?
I am born and brought up in Mumbai for last fifty eight years. Believe me, corruption in Maharashtra is worse than that in Bihar . Look at all the politicians, Sharad Pawar, Chagan Bhujbal, Narayan Rane, Bal Thackray , Gopinath Munde, Raj Thackray, Vilasrao Deshmukh all are rolling in money. Vilasrao Deshmukh is one of the worst Chief ministers I have seen. His only business is to increase the FSI every other day, make money and send it to Delhi , so Congress can fight next election. Now the clown has found new way and will increase FSI for fishermen, so they can build concrete houses right on sea shore. Next time terrorists can comfortably live in those houses, enjoy the beauty of the sea and then attack our Mumbai at their will.
Recently, I had to purchase a house in Mumbai. I met about two dozen builders. Everybody wanted about 30% in black. A common person like me knows this and with all your intelligent agency & CBI, you and your finance ministers are not aware of it. Where all the black money goes? To the underworld isn't it? Our politicians take help of these goondas to vacate people by force. I myself was victim of it. If you have time please come to me, I will tell you everything.
If this has been a land of fools, idiots, then I would not have ever cared to write to you this letter. Just see the tragedy. On one side we are reaching moon, people are so intelligent; and on the other side, you politicians have converted nectar into deadly poison. I am everything Hindu, Muslim, Christian, Schedule caste, OBC, Muslim OBC, Christian Schedule caste, and Creamy Schedule caste; only what I am not is INDIAN. You politicians have raped every part of Mother India by your policy of divide and rule.
Take example of our Former President Abdul Kalam. Such an intelligent person; such a fine human being. But you politician didn't even spare him and instead choose a worthless lady who had corruption charges and insignificant local polititian of Jalgaon WHO'S NAME ENTIRE COUNTRY HAD NOT HEARD BEFORE. Its simple logic your party just wanted a rubber stamp in the name of president. Imagine SHE IS SUPREME COMMANDAR OF INDIA'S THREE DEFENCE FORCES. what moral you will expect from our defence forces ? Your party along with opposition joined hands, because politicians feel they are supreme and there is no place for good person.
Dear Mr Prime minister, you are one of the most intelligent persons, a most learned person. Just wake up, be a real SARDAR. First and foremost, expose all selfish politicians. Ask Swiss banks to give names of all Indian account holders. Give reins of CBI to independent agency. Let them find wolves among us. There will be political upheaval, but that will be better than dance of death which we are witnessing every day. Just give us ambience where we can work honestly and without fear. Let there be rule of law. Everything else will be taken care of.
Choice is yours Mr. Prime Minister. Do you want to be lead by one person, or you want to lead the nation of 100 Crore people?
Prakash B. Bajaj
Editor Mumbai-Times of India
PLEASE READ N FORWARD TO AS MANY PEOPLE IN YOUR CONTACT LIST
At last the press has shown courage. Please read it and pass it on. This is a damning verdict on the Congress government.
LETTER TO PRIME MINISTER BY PRAKASH BAJAJ (EDITOR TOI)
This is "food for thought" for every Indian...
Must Read ! Very Powerfully Worded. Bravo - Prakash Bajaj, Editor of Times of India .
LETTER OF THE EDITOR OF "THE TIMES OF INDIA " TO THE PRIME MINISTER OF INDIA
Dear Mr. Prime minister,
I am a typical mouse from Mumbai. In the local train compartment which has capacity of 100 persons, I travel with 500 more mice. Mouse at least squeaks, but we don't even do that.
Today I heard your speech, in which you said, 'NO BODY WOULD BE SPARED'. I would like to remind you that fourteen years have passed since serial bomb blasts in Mumbai took place. Dawood was the main conspirator. Till today he is not caught. All our Bollywood actors, our builders, our Gutka king keep meeting him, but your Government can not catch him. Reason is simple; all your ministers are hand in glove with him. If any attempt is made to catch him, everybody will be exposed. Your statement 'NOBODY WOULD BE SPARED' is nothing but a cruel joke on these unfortunate people of India .
Enough is enough. As such, after seeing terrorist attack carried out by about a dozen young boys, I realize that if same thing continues, days are not far away when terrorists will attack by air, destroy our nuclear reactors and there will be one more Hiroshima .
We the people are left with only one mantra. Womb to Bomb to Tomb. You promised Mumbaikar Shanghai; what you have given us is Jalianwala Baug.
Today only your home minister resigned. What took you so long to kick out this joker? Only reason was that he was loyal to Gandhi family. Loyalty to Gandhi family is more important than blood of innocent people, isn't it?
I am born and brought up in Mumbai for last fifty eight years. Believe me, corruption in Maharashtra is worse than that in Bihar . Look at all the politicians, Sharad Pawar, Chagan Bhujbal, Narayan Rane, Bal Thackray , Gopinath Munde, Raj Thackray, Vilasrao Deshmukh all are rolling in money. Vilasrao Deshmukh is one of the worst Chief ministers I have seen. His only business is to increase the FSI every other day, make money and send it to Delhi , so Congress can fight next election. Now the clown has found new way and will increase FSI for fishermen, so they can build concrete houses right on sea shore. Next time terrorists can comfortably live in those houses, enjoy the beauty of the sea and then attack our Mumbai at their will.
Recently, I had to purchase a house in Mumbai. I met about two dozen builders. Everybody wanted about 30% in black. A common person like me knows this and with all your intelligent agency & CBI, you and your finance ministers are not aware of it. Where all the black money goes? To the underworld isn't it? Our politicians take help of these goondas to vacate people by force. I myself was victim of it. If you have time please come to me, I will tell you everything.
If this has been a land of fools, idiots, then I would not have ever cared to write to you this letter. Just see the tragedy. On one side we are reaching moon, people are so intelligent; and on the other side, you politicians have converted nectar into deadly poison. I am everything Hindu, Muslim, Christian, Schedule caste, OBC, Muslim OBC, Christian Schedule caste, and Creamy Schedule caste; only what I am not is INDIAN. You politicians have raped every part of Mother India by your policy of divide and rule.
Take example of our Former President Abdul Kalam. Such an intelligent person; such a fine human being. But you politician didn't even spare him and instead choose a worthless lady who had corruption charges and insignificant local polititian of Jalgaon WHO'S NAME ENTIRE COUNTRY HAD NOT HEARD BEFORE. Its simple logic your party just wanted a rubber stamp in the name of president. Imagine SHE IS SUPREME COMMANDAR OF INDIA'S THREE DEFENCE FORCES. what moral you will expect from our defence forces ? Your party along with opposition joined hands, because politicians feel they are supreme and there is no place for good person.
Dear Mr Prime minister, you are one of the most intelligent persons, a most learned person. Just wake up, be a real SARDAR. First and foremost, expose all selfish politicians. Ask Swiss banks to give names of all Indian account holders. Give reins of CBI to independent agency. Let them find wolves among us. There will be political upheaval, but that will be better than dance of death which we are witnessing every day. Just give us ambience where we can work honestly and without fear. Let there be rule of law. Everything else will be taken care of.
Choice is yours Mr. Prime Minister. Do you want to be lead by one person, or you want to lead the nation of 100 Crore people?
Prakash B. Bajaj
Editor Mumbai-Times of India
This is "food for thought" for every Indian...
Must Read ! Very Powerfully Worded. Bravo - Prakash Bajaj, Editor of Times of India .
LETTER OF THE EDITOR OF "THE TIMES OF INDIA " TO THE PRIME MINISTER OF INDIA
Dear Mr. Prime minister,
I am a typical mouse from Mumbai. In the local train compartment which has capacity of 100 persons, I travel with 500 more mice. Mouse at least squeaks, but we don't even do that.
Today I heard your speech, in which you said, 'NO BODY WOULD BE SPARED'. I would like to remind you that fourteen years have passed since serial bomb blasts in Mumbai took place. Dawood was the main conspirator. Till today he is not caught. All our Bollywood actors, our builders, our Gutka king keep meeting him, but your Government can not catch him. Reason is simple; all your ministers are hand in glove with him. If any attempt is made to catch him, everybody will be exposed. Your statement 'NOBODY WOULD BE SPARED' is nothing but a cruel joke on these unfortunate people of India .
Enough is enough. As such, after seeing terrorist attack carried out by about a dozen young boys, I realize that if same thing continues, days are not far away when terrorists will attack by air, destroy our nuclear reactors and there will be one more Hiroshima .
We the people are left with only one mantra. Womb to Bomb to Tomb. You promised Mumbaikar Shanghai; what you have given us is Jalianwala Baug.
Today only your home minister resigned. What took you so long to kick out this joker? Only reason was that he was loyal to Gandhi family. Loyalty to Gandhi family is more important than blood of innocent people, isn't it?
I am born and brought up in Mumbai for last fifty eight years. Believe me, corruption in Maharashtra is worse than that in Bihar . Look at all the politicians, Sharad Pawar, Chagan Bhujbal, Narayan Rane, Bal Thackray , Gopinath Munde, Raj Thackray, Vilasrao Deshmukh all are rolling in money. Vilasrao Deshmukh is one of the worst Chief ministers I have seen. His only business is to increase the FSI every other day, make money and send it to Delhi , so Congress can fight next election. Now the clown has found new way and will increase FSI for fishermen, so they can build concrete houses right on sea shore. Next time terrorists can comfortably live in those houses, enjoy the beauty of the sea and then attack our Mumbai at their will.
Recently, I had to purchase a house in Mumbai. I met about two dozen builders. Everybody wanted about 30% in black. A common person like me knows this and with all your intelligent agency & CBI, you and your finance ministers are not aware of it. Where all the black money goes? To the underworld isn't it? Our politicians take help of these goondas to vacate people by force. I myself was victim of it. If you have time please come to me, I will tell you everything.
If this has been a land of fools, idiots, then I would not have ever cared to write to you this letter. Just see the tragedy. On one side we are reaching moon, people are so intelligent; and on the other side, you politicians have converted nectar into deadly poison. I am everything Hindu, Muslim, Christian, Schedule caste, OBC, Muslim OBC, Christian Schedule caste, and Creamy Schedule caste; only what I am not is INDIAN. You politicians have raped every part of Mother India by your policy of divide and rule.
Take example of our Former President Abdul Kalam. Such an intelligent person; such a fine human being. But you politician didn't even spare him and instead choose a worthless lady who had corruption charges and insignificant local polititian of Jalgaon WHO'S NAME ENTIRE COUNTRY HAD NOT HEARD BEFORE. Its simple logic your party just wanted a rubber stamp in the name of president. Imagine SHE IS SUPREME COMMANDAR OF INDIA'S THREE DEFENCE FORCES. what moral you will expect from our defence forces ? Your party along with opposition joined hands, because politicians feel they are supreme and there is no place for good person.
Dear Mr Prime minister, you are one of the most intelligent persons, a most learned person. Just wake up, be a real SARDAR. First and foremost, expose all selfish politicians. Ask Swiss banks to give names of all Indian account holders. Give reins of CBI to independent agency. Let them find wolves among us. There will be political upheaval, but that will be better than dance of death which we are witnessing every day. Just give us ambience where we can work honestly and without fear. Let there be rule of law. Everything else will be taken care of.
Choice is yours Mr. Prime Minister. Do you want to be lead by one person, or you want to lead the nation of 100 Crore people?
Prakash B. Bajaj
Editor Mumbai-Times of India
PLEASE READ N FORWARD TO AS MANY PEOPLE IN YOUR CONTACT LIST
At last the press has shown courage. Please read it and pass it on. This is a damning verdict on the Congress government.
LETTER TO PRIME MINISTER BY PRAKASH BAJAJ (EDITOR TOI)
This is "food for thought" for every Indian...
Must Read ! Very Powerfully Worded. Bravo - Prakash Bajaj, Editor of Times of India .
LETTER OF THE EDITOR OF "THE TIMES OF INDIA " TO THE PRIME MINISTER OF INDIA
Dear Mr. Prime minister,
I am a typical mouse from Mumbai. In the local train compartment which has capacity of 100 persons, I travel with 500 more mice. Mouse at least squeaks, but we don't even do that.
Today I heard your speech, in which you said, 'NO BODY WOULD BE SPARED'. I would like to remind you that fourteen years have passed since serial bomb blasts in Mumbai took place. Dawood was the main conspirator. Till today he is not caught. All our Bollywood actors, our builders, our Gutka king keep meeting him, but your Government can not catch him. Reason is simple; all your ministers are hand in glove with him. If any attempt is made to catch him, everybody will be exposed. Your statement 'NOBODY WOULD BE SPARED' is nothing but a cruel joke on these unfortunate people of India .
Enough is enough. As such, after seeing terrorist attack carried out by about a dozen young boys, I realize that if same thing continues, days are not far away when terrorists will attack by air, destroy our nuclear reactors and there will be one more Hiroshima .
We the people are left with only one mantra. Womb to Bomb to Tomb. You promised Mumbaikar Shanghai; what you have given us is Jalianwala Baug.
Today only your home minister resigned. What took you so long to kick out this joker? Only reason was that he was loyal to Gandhi family. Loyalty to Gandhi family is more important than blood of innocent people, isn't it?
I am born and brought up in Mumbai for last fifty eight years. Believe me, corruption in Maharashtra is worse than that in Bihar . Look at all the politicians, Sharad Pawar, Chagan Bhujbal, Narayan Rane, Bal Thackray , Gopinath Munde, Raj Thackray, Vilasrao Deshmukh all are rolling in money. Vilasrao Deshmukh is one of the worst Chief ministers I have seen. His only business is to increase the FSI every other day, make money and send it to Delhi , so Congress can fight next election. Now the clown has found new way and will increase FSI for fishermen, so they can build concrete houses right on sea shore. Next time terrorists can comfortably live in those houses, enjoy the beauty of the sea and then attack our Mumbai at their will.
Recently, I had to purchase a house in Mumbai. I met about two dozen builders. Everybody wanted about 30% in black. A common person like me knows this and with all your intelligent agency & CBI, you and your finance ministers are not aware of it. Where all the black money goes? To the underworld isn't it? Our politicians take help of these goondas to vacate people by force. I myself was victim of it. If you have time please come to me, I will tell you everything.
If this has been a land of fools, idiots, then I would not have ever cared to write to you this letter. Just see the tragedy. On one side we are reaching moon, people are so intelligent; and on the other side, you politicians have converted nectar into deadly poison. I am everything Hindu, Muslim, Christian, Schedule caste, OBC, Muslim OBC, Christian Schedule caste, and Creamy Schedule caste; only what I am not is INDIAN. You politicians have raped every part of Mother India by your policy of divide and rule.
Take example of our Former President Abdul Kalam. Such an intelligent person; such a fine human being. But you politician didn't even spare him and instead choose a worthless lady who had corruption charges and insignificant local polititian of Jalgaon WHO'S NAME ENTIRE COUNTRY HAD NOT HEARD BEFORE. Its simple logic your party just wanted a rubber stamp in the name of president. Imagine SHE IS SUPREME COMMANDAR OF INDIA'S THREE DEFENCE FORCES. what moral you will expect from our defence forces ? Your party along with opposition joined hands, because politicians feel they are supreme and there is no place for good person.
Dear Mr Prime minister, you are one of the most intelligent persons, a most learned person. Just wake up, be a real SARDAR. First and foremost, expose all selfish politicians. Ask Swiss banks to give names of all Indian account holders. Give reins of CBI to independent agency. Let them find wolves among us. There will be political upheaval, but that will be better than dance of death which we are witnessing every day. Just give us ambience where we can work honestly and without fear. Let there be rule of law. Everything else will be taken care of.
Choice is yours Mr. Prime Minister. Do you want to be lead by one person, or you want to lead the nation of 100 Crore people?
Prakash B. Bajaj
Editor Mumbai-Times of India
Saturday, January 8, 2011
5 Less explored hill stations you must visit
Are you a lover of trekking and camping in jungles on hill slopes? Often mesmerized by cool salubrious air and stunning scenery of mountains and hill stations? If yes, then take a few days off from work and zoom to one of the exotic hill stations for real refreshment. India is home to a number of eye-catching hill stations. While some of them are very famous all around the world, some are still less trodden. Below is a list of five less explored hill stations in India, which can be a real treat for any passionate traveler and nature enthusiast.
Tawang
The land of Monpa tribe, Tawang is a district in Arunachal Pradesh. It is among the most preferred travel destination for Buddhists. Tawang is located at a height of 12,000 ft. above the sea level and shares its border with Tibet and Bhutan. Packed with divine nature and peace, Tawang is also an adventure option for the outdoor buff. Although it is little tiring getting into Tawang, but once you reach there its splendid view will make you realize that it is worth all the trouble reaching this place. Tawang is around 525 km away and a 20 hour drive from Guwahati. From Tezpur Tawang is 345 km or a 12 -13 hours journey. Regular bus services are available from Guwahati and Tezpur.
Kalimpong
With its quiet atmosphere, Kalimpong is a major attraction for travelers. It is in Darjeeling district in the northern part of West Bengal. There are a number of religious sites to see, including the Catholic church and Zong Dhog Palri Fo Brang monastery. Located in the foot-hills of the Himalayas, amidst verdant green environment, Kalimpong offers breath-taking views of snow capped mountain peaks. The nearest airport is Bagdogra which is 80 kms from Kalimpong. Jeeps are also available from Darjeeling, Siliguri and Gangtok.
Chamba Valley
Noted for the magnificence of its beautiful scenery, Chamba Valley has three well-defined snowy ranges, the Dauladhar, constituting the outer Himalayas, the Pir Panjal or the mid Himalayas, and the Zanskar range or the inner Himalayas. The land of mystic serenity and lofty mountain passes and slopes, Chamba Valley is situated at the height of 996 m. above sea level on the south bank of the Ravi River. It is just 56 km from Dalhousie. Daily bus service is available from Dalhousie.
Palampur
Also known as the ?Tea Capital of North India?, Palampur is at a height of 1,220 meters above sea level and is situated in the Kangra valley, close to the Dhauladhar Range. It is in the northwestern region of Himachal Pradesh. One can enjoy the scenic beauty of the Dhauladhar range and the slopes of the Kangra valley from Palampur. The scenery presents a sublime and beautiful contrast, while the hills are majestic. The nearest railway station is at Maranda, which is 2 km from Palampur. Bus service is available from Palampur to Dharamshala, Mandi, and Pathankot.
Dhanaulti
Located amidst the thick virgin forests of deodar, rhododendron and oak, Dhanaulti is a woody paradise and the launching point for numerous treks into the snow-capped Himalayas. It is situated on Mussoorie ? Chamba road at an elevation of 2286mts above sea level. The region receives snowfall during winters making it even more captivating destination. Tourists can come to Dhanaulti at any time of the year. Nearest airport is Jolly Grant, Dehradun. Dhanaulti is well connected to Dehradun, Delhi and Rishikesh.
The land of Monpa tribe, Tawang is a district in Arunachal Pradesh. It is among the most preferred travel destination for Buddhists. Tawang is located at a height of 12,000 ft. above the sea level and shares its border with Tibet and Bhutan. Packed with divine nature and peace, Tawang is also an adventure option for the outdoor buff. Although it is little tiring getting into Tawang, but once you reach there its splendid view will make you realize that it is worth all the trouble reaching this place. Tawang is around 525 km away and a 20 hour drive from Guwahati. From Tezpur Tawang is 345 km or a 12 -13 hours journey. Regular bus services are available from Guwahati and Tezpur.
Kalimpong
With its quiet atmosphere, Kalimpong is a major attraction for travelers. It is in Darjeeling district in the northern part of West Bengal. There are a number of religious sites to see, including the Catholic church and Zong Dhog Palri Fo Brang monastery. Located in the foot-hills of the Himalayas, amidst verdant green environment, Kalimpong offers breath-taking views of snow capped mountain peaks. The nearest airport is Bagdogra which is 80 kms from Kalimpong. Jeeps are also available from Darjeeling, Siliguri and Gangtok.
Chamba Valley
Noted for the magnificence of its beautiful scenery, Chamba Valley has three well-defined snowy ranges, the Dauladhar, constituting the outer Himalayas, the Pir Panjal or the mid Himalayas, and the Zanskar range or the inner Himalayas. The land of mystic serenity and lofty mountain passes and slopes, Chamba Valley is situated at the height of 996 m. above sea level on the south bank of the Ravi River. It is just 56 km from Dalhousie. Daily bus service is available from Dalhousie.
Palampur
Also known as the ?Tea Capital of North India?, Palampur is at a height of 1,220 meters above sea level and is situated in the Kangra valley, close to the Dhauladhar Range. It is in the northwestern region of Himachal Pradesh. One can enjoy the scenic beauty of the Dhauladhar range and the slopes of the Kangra valley from Palampur. The scenery presents a sublime and beautiful contrast, while the hills are majestic. The nearest railway station is at Maranda, which is 2 km from Palampur. Bus service is available from Palampur to Dharamshala, Mandi, and Pathankot.
Dhanaulti
Located amidst the thick virgin forests of deodar, rhododendron and oak, Dhanaulti is a woody paradise and the launching point for numerous treks into the snow-capped Himalayas. It is situated on Mussoorie ? Chamba road at an elevation of 2286mts above sea level. The region receives snowfall during winters making it even more captivating destination. Tourists can come to Dhanaulti at any time of the year. Nearest airport is Jolly Grant, Dehradun. Dhanaulti is well connected to Dehradun, Delhi and Rishikesh.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
JOKES
Watz fastst thng in World?
OxfrdGuy: Light
HarvrdGuy: Thought
......
TxasGuy: Blink of Eye
Banta- Loose Motions
................................................................
Newly WEDDED santa nd his wife
Santa's wife: Humari Shadi Ko 24 Ghante Ho Chuke Hai
Santa in ROMANTIC style:Aur Esa Lagta Hai Jese Kal Ki Hi Baat Ho
..................................................................................
OxfrdGuy: Light
HarvrdGuy: Thought
......
TxasGuy: Blink of Eye
Banta- Loose Motions
................................................................
Newly WEDDED santa nd his wife
Santa's wife: Humari Shadi Ko 24 Ghante Ho Chuke Hai
Santa in ROMANTIC style:Aur Esa Lagta Hai Jese Kal Ki Hi Baat Ho
..................................................................................
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Interesting Facts
There are few things which perhaps we didn't know ...
Like......
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
1. Coca-Cola was originally green.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
2. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
3.The name of all the continents end with the same letter
that they start with.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
4. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
5. There are two credit cards for every person in the United
States.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
6. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using
the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
7. Women blink nearly twice as much as men!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
8. You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
9. It is impossible to lick your elbow.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
10. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when
you sneeze ,your heart stops for a millisecond.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
11. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the
sky.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
12. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be
the toughest tongue twister in the English language.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
13. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you
try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel
in your head or neck and die.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
14. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents great
king from history.
Spades - King David
Clubs - Alexander the Great,
Hearts - Charlemagne
Diamonds - Julius Caesar.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
15. 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
16. If a statue of a person in the park on a horse has both
front legs in the air, the person died in battle.
If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as
a result of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has a all four legs on the ground, the person
died of natural causes.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
17 What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield
wipers and laser printers all have in common?
Ans.. - All invented by women.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
18. Question - This is the only food that doesn't spoil. What
is this?
Ans. - Honey
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
19. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
20. A snail can sleep for three years.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
21. All polar bears are left handed..
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
22. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating
one olive from each salad served in first-class.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
23. Butterflies taste with their feet.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
24.Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
25.In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been
domesticated.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
26. On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
27. Shakespeare invented the word 'assassination' and
'bump'.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
28. Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the
left hand.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
29. The ant always falls over on its right side when
intoxicated.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
30. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
31. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
32. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats
could have over million descendants.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
33. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
34. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
35. Most lipstick contains fish scales.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
36. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
37. And finally 99% of people who read this will try to lick
their elbow
Like......
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
1. Coca-Cola was originally green.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
2. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
3.The name of all the continents end with the same letter
that they start with.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
4. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
5. There are two credit cards for every person in the United
States.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
6. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using
the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
7. Women blink nearly twice as much as men!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
8. You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
9. It is impossible to lick your elbow.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
10. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when
you sneeze ,your heart stops for a millisecond.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
11. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the
sky.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
12. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be
the toughest tongue twister in the English language.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
13. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you
try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel
in your head or neck and die.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
14. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents great
king from history.
Spades - King David
Clubs - Alexander the Great,
Hearts - Charlemagne
Diamonds - Julius Caesar.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
15. 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
16. If a statue of a person in the park on a horse has both
front legs in the air, the person died in battle.
If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as
a result of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has a all four legs on the ground, the person
died of natural causes.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
17 What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield
wipers and laser printers all have in common?
Ans.. - All invented by women.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
18. Question - This is the only food that doesn't spoil. What
is this?
Ans. - Honey
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
19. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
20. A snail can sleep for three years.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
21. All polar bears are left handed..
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
22. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating
one olive from each salad served in first-class.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
23. Butterflies taste with their feet.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
24.Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
25.In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been
domesticated.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
26. On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
27. Shakespeare invented the word 'assassination' and
'bump'.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
28. Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the
left hand.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
29. The ant always falls over on its right side when
intoxicated.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
30. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
31. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
32. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats
could have over million descendants.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
33. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
34. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
35. Most lipstick contains fish scales.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
36. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
37. And finally 99% of people who read this will try to lick
their elbow
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
JOKES
1. Women are unpredictable.
Before marriage, she expects a man,
after marriage she suspects him,
and after death she respects him.
———————-
2. There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much
They got married - and now he is going thru hell.
———————-
3. A man inserted an `ad' in the classifieds :
"Wife wanted ". Next day, he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing :
"You can have mine."
———————-
4. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure
of one thing:
either the car is new or the wife.
———————-
5. It's easy to tell if a man is married or not.
Just watch him drive a car with a woman sitting beside him. If both his hands are on the wheel, you can be sure he is married.
———————-
6. A man received a letter
from some Kidnappers. The letter said, " if you don't promised to send us $100,000 I swear that we will kidnap your wife."
The poor man wrote back, " I am afraid I can't keep my promise but I hope you will keep yours."
———————-
7. What's the matter,
you look depressed." "I'm having trouble with my wife."
"What happened?" "She said she wasn't going to speak to me for 30 days."
"But that ought to make you happy."
"It did, but today is the last day."
———————-
8.WOMAN
When she is 18 - She is a football, 22 men going after her.
When she is 28 - She is a hockey ball, 8 men going after her.
When she is 38 - She is a golf ball, 1 man hitting on her.
When she is 48 - She is a pingpong ball, 2 men pushing to each other.
———————-
9.MAN
At 20 - A man is like a coconut, so much to offer, so little to give.
At 30 - He is like a durian, dangerous but delicious.
At 40 - He is like a watermelon, big, round and juicy.
At 50 - He is like a mandarin orange, the season comes once in a year.
At 60 - He is just like a raisin, dried out, wrinkles and cheap.
———————-
10.Marriage Humour
In the beginning, God created earth and rested.
Then God created man and rested.
Then God created woman.
Since then, neither God nor man has rested.
———————-
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Joke of the Day
A kid was playing with his newly bought play train.
After every turn was completed the kid stopped the train
and shouted, "Station aa gaya hai... Jis ULLU KE PATHEY ko utarna hai utar jaye..!"
Then he let the train go on the round and stopped it again at the same place.
He shouted, "Station aa gaya hai..! Jis ULLU KE PATHEY ko utarna hai utar jaye..!"
And so it went for sometime. Every time the train stopped the kid would scream the same sentence.
His Dad, sitting near him, got a little worried about the kid using bad language.
He took the train away from him and scolded the child, "Do not talk like that!"
The kid sat silently for sometime and Dad could not bear to see the sad innocent face.
He returned the train back to him saying, "Now son, do not talk like that again."
The kid started playing. The train took the same turn and stopped and the kid shouted, "Station aa gaya hai..! Jis ULLU KE PATHE ko utarna hai utar jaye..!
Pehley hi ek ULLU KE PATHEY ke wajah se train late ho gaye hai..."
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Clean as cold water can get it
A young man went to his grandfather's place to stay for the weekend. He was sitting down to lunch when he noticed that the spoons and forks were encrusted in a thin filmy substance.
He asked his grandfather,"Are you sure you washed it properly?"
"As clean as cold water can get it" was the reply.
So the young man shrugged and started eating.
The next day at breakfast he noticed that the plates were dirty and grimy. It also smelled a bit like dog.
Are you sure you washed it properly?"
"Clean as cold water can get it" was the reply again.
The man, a bit suspicious for his health, looked at his grandfather, than at his plate and started eating.
As he was leaving, his grandfather's dog jumped out in front of him, growled and generally blocked him from going forward.
"Cold water, leave the poor boy alone!" shouted the old man from inside
He asked his grandfather,"Are you sure you washed it properly?"
"As clean as cold water can get it" was the reply.
So the young man shrugged and started eating.
The next day at breakfast he noticed that the plates were dirty and grimy. It also smelled a bit like dog.
Are you sure you washed it properly?"
"Clean as cold water can get it" was the reply again.
The man, a bit suspicious for his health, looked at his grandfather, than at his plate and started eating.
As he was leaving, his grandfather's dog jumped out in front of him, growled and generally blocked him from going forward.
"Cold water, leave the poor boy alone!" shouted the old man from inside
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)